Rūta Bražiūnienė

HEALING WOUNDS BETWEEN LT-AMERICANS AND HOMELAND LITHUANIA
Our debate topic in VilNews Forum, with the above headline, has now attracted more than 200 comments. Here is one of the posts, written by Rūta Bražiūnienė:

While I noticed that the above 156 comments argue about passports, I just have an issue with the first post, that I have not noticed be addressed, yet. "Many here in Lithuania still believe that those who left, whether for economic or political reasons, had very comfortable lives compared to those who stayed behind and had to fight through several decades of inhuman oppression and abuse by the Soviet occupiers."

I totally assume, based on my own previous experience, that people who think that those who left Lithuania had a comfortable life, are sadly mistaken. My parents fled within hours of occupation. They saw close relatives, neighbors, friends be killed by Soviets. They fled to save their lives.

It's hard not to generalize, as we all seem to do that quite well. That generation, who had to make decisions to flee, thought that they would be back in days. Then weeks. Then months. And before they knew it, years passed. They lived in DP (displaced person) camps. There was no luxury there.

The horrors of the Soviet oppressors made them band together, to lobby their politicians, start Lithuanian schools, cultural dance and song groups, and anything they could do to keep the memory of their Lithuania alive. (Estonians and Latvians were in the same situation).

I can vouch for many in my generation, that we were shocked at the devastation of the Baltic lands when we visited decades later. We had heard of a paradise Lithuania our entire lives, and visiting it - was... well, a rude awakening.

Sure, they over-generalized, too. But we banded together, Baltics displaced by WWII all over the world, and continued our parents' traditions, and did what we could to help free the Baltic States. Our parents never had it easy. They worked two jobs, not in their educated field, and suffered a different way, than their brothers and sisters who remained. They sent most of their pay, clothes, food, just to help those whom they could.

Luckily, some made a good life for themselves. But many more tried what they could just to make ends meet.

So when Lithuania was freed, imagine our surprise when there is this almost hatred for those who left. We were just happy to be reunited, or for others, seeing the relatives our parents no longer could.

Nobody had it easy. I wish that those left to grow up under Soviet rule would understand that.

The only thing that would have happened, had our parents not fled, is that they, too, would have been killed by the Soviets.

With all of this contempt, crime, and mostly - lack of acceptance - who would want to move back, only to be labeled, mugged, robbed, humiliated, etc? It's not easy for anybody, folks. We all agree that the Soviets destroyed families, hope, land, etc. What good does arguing about who had it worse do?

We need to move forward. We can't change the past. So all we can do is work towards one goal of acceptance. Please.